I was recently watching a Louis Rossman video where he goes over a Business Insider article about how a guy applied to over 10 jobs and only one even bothered to set up an interview. Louis had some great takes and input on the matter of a “labor shortage”. However, there is one thing Louis didn’t touch on; one I don’t think many people know about. It is the online application system every company uses. The only reason I know about this is because I had filed for unemployment and their resume class was mandatory before I could pick up a check. So, let’s a go!
First, I want to discuss something that seems out of place but isn’t: why I signed up for unemployment. My employer had fired me and then lied about why they fired me to the TX state gov. When I applied for unemployment it took 3 tries before I got it because they lied to the state, twice. The first time they said when I went to Wuhan that I no called no showed for 2 weeks. I had records to prove otherwise. The second time they lied they said all the times I had to go to a mental health clinic was unscheduled and I never called in. Not only did I have emails proving they ignored my requests but also proof I called in.
You’ll notice I am not saying which employer this is. I do not know if I will need to go back to the US. If I do, I need to maintain a level of professionalism. Not only that, my old employer Googles themselves and sends out threats and lawsuits. They threatened someone, and fired them, for making a Snapchat moment that said they loved working there in front of the building. They don’t play. Not only do they not fuck around, and I am not willing to find out, future employers will Google you and see what you said about past employers. If you mentioned them by name and shat on them then congratulations! Your application is “out ze fuckin’ vindow vit zat”. HR at some companies will use internet archive and Wayback Machine to check on you too. Keep that in mind when you apply.
So, after them lying to the gov and me fighting it I finally get on unemployment. Which, I didn’t know if you don’t take all the checks they still tax you as if you did. Big whoops there. Talk about getting punished for trying to save the state some money. Before I could get a check I had to take some workshop classes. A mandatory one was resume building. This was a class I was super excited for as everyone knows an amazing looking resume gets you a job. Your resume could say your last job was skinning baby seals with the teeth of sea turtles but if it looked good you’d get hired.
What did I learn in this class? I learned that every company that takes online applications uses one of 3 major resume platforms. These platforms have a few quirks that make ZERO FUCKING SENSE. How so? The system will randomly throw away an unknown percent of applications. Yes, if you apply to a job online there is a chance your application is just tossed by the computer because fuck you, that’s why. If you’ve ever wondered why if a friend referred you and went to HR but HR never received your application, then this is why. The system just chucked it and you look bad to the HR rep.
So, not only does your application have a chance to be trashed it will for sure be trashed if your resume isn’t readable by the software. What do I mean? Well, have you ever uploaded a resume to a company then need to manually fill it out and half the info is there correctly but the other half is wrong or missing? That means the software couldn’t read your resume. You see, doing stuff like bold, italics, and other things to make it easier for human’s to read can confuse these applications. The software doesn’t read your application unless you pass the random chance. Meaning, after your resume wasn’t thrown away by chance it could be thrown away because you made it readable for humans.
What do you do? The trick we were taught is see which software the company you’re applying to is using then find a company like Target, Walmart, and such that you don’t want to apply to. Apparently the companies keep logs of how long it takes you to apply, and how often. Keep uploading your resume and work on getting it perfect so the AI can auto fill out all the forms perfectly. Then make it readable for a human while the AI can still do this. That is how you have a perfect resume that gets through most systems.
However, even this isn’t a guarantee to work. See, companies need to pay for this software. So, if a company is using version 4.3 and another is using 4.8 they could process the resume differently. This is where it gets super tricky and why their workaround doesn’t work too well. My suggestion is instead to mask your IP and DNS while using an application with a random name like “Tommy Thumper”.
What about websites like Indeed and Monster? Well, no one knows how they really work. What they were able to tell us in that class is that those personality and IQ tests matter a lot and certain companies have definite do not hire answers. Meaning your resume is tossed right away because you answered yes or no to something about your relationship with your mom. Both of these websites advertise that they can filter for better clients than others. However, no one knows how they do it, according to this workshop I went to.
Then there’s also the subject of your credit score. If you have a bad credit score certain jobs won’t even look at you. See, your future employer is not allowed to ask certain questions about you. Especially questions about reliability and finances, unless you’re going into finance and it is work related. How do they check if you’re reliable? They check your credit score. You see, if you have a good credit score then you must be reliable! If you have a bad one you must not be! Never mind people can steal your identity and ruin your credit score. If that happens it can take months to years to get that shit sorted out. Maybe you cosigned something for a family member and they fucked up and tanked your credit too. There’s a lot of reasons why checking a credit score for a job is dumb. Especially because if they have a bad credit score they more than likely need the money and will work harder.
Even after going to this workshop and having the unemployment offices headhunt, and help me with my resume, I was unable to find work. In the end, even knowing this horseshit, it comes down to luck. Even with the unemployment offices helping me I went from 1 call back every 2 weeks to 2 a week. However, jobs were lying on their listings or wanting way more experience for something that didn’t need it. One job wanted me to know how to fix a PSU for IT for a medical company. Eat a dick on me working on a PSU. I enjoy living, kind of. One even said they’d hire at $30/hr on the state website and only require 35 hours a week. In the interview they told me it was $9/hr, I would be 24/7 on call, needed to live within 5 miles of the job, and always be within a 25 mile radius of the job. You know, just in case they need to call me in. I also needed to install tracking software on my phone. A major issue with this is the cheapest place to live in those restrictions required proof of salary of $23/hr. Which this is something Rossman, and the Business Insider article, went over. Companies who are contacting people are doing the same shit. Lying about what your work will be and how much you will make.
The employment shortage is a weird issue. It is not purely because of people getting Covid money. There’s cases of employers lying or being picky with limited talent pool. Then you also have the technical side these companies have relied on forever now making getting applicants harder too. I felt it was important to bring this up as I haven’t seen anyone talk about this, and it was a major talking point in my unemployment workshop.